Figures of speech

It's sniffle time of year again and I happened to sneeze as we were driving somewhere the other day. Aside: FYI, I am not, nor have I ever been, a dainty sneezer. Try as I might, I still worry about closed windows overpressurizing when I feel a sneeze coming on. It would seem it is physically impossible to re-learn to sneeze. Sort of like keeping your eyes open when you sneeze. Can't be done. Unless you know something I don't know... Anyways, this sneeze was a particularly enthusiastic blast and without much thought I said, "Excuse me. Almost lost my eyeballs on that one."

After a moment of silence, a small voice came from the backseat.

"Is that a figure of speech?"

De-stuffing

I've undertaken the massive project of de-stuffing my house. Partly the need arose because we've lived in this house BY FAR longer than we've ever lived in one location before. I didn't realize that moving had become a way to clean my closets up until now.

Partly, the need arose through the fact that I've been helping a friend get ready to move for the last three months. She has a lot of STUFF. Her STUFF is much higher quality that my STUFF but it still left me with the nasty feeling that this was going to be my life in 30 years if I didn't do something about it NOW.

So while SG was out of town I began by emptying our walk in closet. And slept in the studio for 3 nights.

I discovered something that I'd know for awhile but had managed to fairly successfully repress. I'm a packrat. Don't know why but do know I can't deny it any longer.

Or maybe I do know why. It defies common sense to say that I need 1 cup hook (for instance) so I buy a package of 6. I use one and leave 5 stashed in a drawer. After two years, I throw out/donate/pawn-off-on-unsuspecting-friends the 5 hooks. Then, one week after getting rid of them, I need 1. So I buy a package of 6. See how this goes?

So now I'm looking at 2 Christmas ornaments, a piece of blue plastic that broke off a toy train that I'm pretty sure we got rid of but hate to throw it out until I'm POSITIVE we got rid of it, a wooden star that came off the end of a wall hanging rod that served as a fairy wand when the star I'm holding came off but is still in the house somewhere, an odd sock (I've a basket for those somewhere) and a Ziploc bag of random buttons.

And I've only gone through one box so far.

Maybe I just need to move ...

Taylor The Latte Boy

I was reminded of this song at a talent show tonight and was happy for the reminder. Hope it makes you smile too.

Funny signs

Long time ago, I posted a sign that caught my attention. Somebody must have taken it as a challenge because the funny, quirky and downright odd signs started appearing everywhere we traveled. So rather than just sit giggling quietly to myself, here's a few to share:

(Kimberley, BC)

(One of a series of Manitoba safety signs)

(Saskatoon, SK - read carefully...)

(Kimberley, BC again - The name says it all, don't you think? I still have no idea what 'The Gilded Goat' is/does/sells...)

(Columbia, MO - there's a reason this actually makes sense, I just can remember it.)

(Kenora, ON)

(Brain the size of a walnut, eh?)

(Colorado Springs, CO - nice welcoming sign that was posted at the Garden of the Gods - right beside some advice on how to avoid being hit by lightening.)

(Hays, KS)


(Erie, PA - On the other side of this store is a bright yellow Jelly Belly billboard with a reader board directly underneath that said "Machetes, knives, swords, ...)

And one of my personal favorites...

(Hayes, KY)

This stuff just writes itself some days!

A shout out for Dads!

I know it's not Father's Day but there's a hundred and one reasons to give dads a shout out whenever. There is nothing cooler, more endearing, and (dare I say) sexier than a great dad. (Feel the need to insert something here about "just not your own dad - eeeewww!" but will hope common sense inserts that automatically for you.)

Here's a couple of my all-time favorite dad vids - so perfect!!





Keep up the good work, dads!!

I missed Blissed

I already mentioned that we recently finished a vacation odyssey. It was a fabulous trip (fab, fab, fab) - in total we covered 6 provinces and 15 states. 7500 miles of driving. Lots of friends and family. Lots of strangers. Long time on the road but also not long enough.

In looking back, there's one disappointment though.

I missed Blissed.


They were on the road and we had a (granted slim) chance to hook up with them somewhere in northern Pennsylvania. But time and tide and all that stuff meant we missed them by about 40 feet. Or three hours, depending on how you look at it. It was late, they were trying to get home, yada, yada ...

A few people might be surprised to hear that this is a group I would be willing to meet in a dark parking lot. Even a dark alley. But it still didn't work out.

And now I find out they're launching a new CD soon. MAN!!

So here's a sneak peak at the cover. Not autographed or anything. But still...


Keep an eye out. They may be driving past your place in the dark, too.

These are my favorite (Canadian) things

We've just returned from a vacation that covered more of Canada that usual. It was an odyssey. The funnest part was walking into a store and saying "Oh, yeah!!!" when something that we haven't seen in awhile was on the shelf.

So we've compiled a short list of some of our favorite Canadian things. (I know, some are available across various borders but not where I live.)

What tops the list?

Coffee Crisp (It's really the only way I do coffee.)

Lynch's Honey Mustard Sauce

Bird Custard Powder

Old Dutch Ketchup chips (and Creamy Dill, too - thanks, Julie, for the introduction)

Aero Bar (not so much the Bubbles, though)

Iced tea (real iced tea, not just tea that has been iced!) - particular favorite: No Name California Blend iced tea mix. The irony is almost as delicious as the iced tea.

SHREDDIES!! (The diamond thing? Really! Don't need it.)

Boston Pizza (only the Canadian ones, though. The US ones did something nasty with their menu. And the service typically stinks.)

Nanaimo squares

Creamed honey - preferably from Podolski Honey Farm (it's so good even customs' officials don't let it through)

Ozonol (the best thing for a red tissue-buffed nose EVER)

Matrimonial cake

Barq's Red Cream Soda


There's a few I've probably forgotten but if you are ever not sure what to put in my Christmas package or have a little more room in your suitcase, maybe put this list on the fridge.

I'm just saying...