Product warnings

We've all seen them - those ridiculous warning labels that tell us what any person with a lick of sense should know. Like the "caution - contents are hot and may scald" on your coffee cup, or the "do not use in bathtub" labels on toasters.

Well, I found another one. I was at a belt-testing at a local Tae Kwon Do school last weekend, and part of the upper belt-level testing is that the student has to break two boards - one with a hand move and one with their foot. The boards are about 12 inches square, 3/4" thick and are specially dried to be breakable. I mean it's not like they're going after green lumber or anything. But you do have to hit them just right to break them. (I'm speaking as an observer, not from experience.) But it's also a one-time thing - you break it, it's broken, right?

So while gathering some of the pieces I noticed this...


(In case you can't read the fine print, I'll give it to you again. It says...

"This product is sold for use in HIGH RISK activities. Read [the company's] Terms and Conditions. Consult your physician prior to starting any training program. Injuries, including paralysis and death can result when using this product. USER ASSUMES ALL RISK OF INJURY!

Inspect product before eash use. If any unsafe conditions are found, discontinue use immediately and contact [company] for a replacement."

There are so many levels that this is nonsense that my head hurts just thinking about it. And the real irony? The warning was only on one of the boards...